When it comes to gossip, I have to readily admit men are as guilty as women.

An American Monkey after getting drunk on Brandy would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men.

Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.

I was young and foolish then; now I am old and foolisher.

New Orleans food is as delicious as the less criminal forms of sin.

I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won't.