One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.

Quitting smoking is easy, I've done it hundreds of times.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're misinformed.

Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.