Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

If voting made any difference, they wouldn't let us do it.

If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!

When I first met him [David Beckham] I didn't know whether to shake his hand or lick his face.

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.