Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

I've always wanted to smash a guitar over someone's head. You just can't do that with a piano.

If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!

My first date has been...mythologized as 'Bieber's Dating Disaster.' I took her to a buffet restaurant. Yes, I wore a white shirt. Yes, I got spaghetti.

Love means having to say you're sorry every fifteen minutes.