By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day.

If I ever have any back-up dancers, I want the penguins from Madagascar.

Voting for Trump is like asking me to drive a car.

Las Vegas is the only place I know where money really talks - it says, Goodbye.

A man doesn't know what happiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.