Call no man unhappy until he is married.

Both marriage and death ought to be welcome: the one promises happiness, doubtless the other assures it.

As for his secret to staying married: "My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she is coming with me."

My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.

If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!

It's a dangerous thing to be married right up to the hilt, like my daughter's husband. The man is at home all day, like a damned soul in hell.