I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

Don't throw me teddy-bears, I'm 23! I'm a man! Throw me condoms or money! Paper, not coins.

A man doesn't know what happiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes.

I believe our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey.