An American Monkey after getting drunk on Brandy would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men.

Smoking too much makes me nervous. Must lasso my natural tendency to acquire such habits. Holding heavy cigar constantly in my mouth has deformed my upper lip, it has a sort of Havana curl.

If you eliminate smoking and gambling, you will be amazed to find that almost all an Englishman's pleasures can be, and mostly are, shared by his dog.

When majority is insane, sane must go to asylum.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

New Orleans food is as delicious as the less criminal forms of sin.