Voting for Trump is like asking me to drive a car.

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

If a person offends you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance, and hit him with a brick.

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.