Microphones are just like people, if you shout at them, they get scared.

I am alive and well and unconcerned about the rumors of my death. But if I were dead, I would be the last to know.

How awful the thought of oneness-the yoga idea. One merging into all and all merging into one. Just think of merging into Herbert Hoover.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're misinformed.

Alcohol is the devil and I need Chinese food.

If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.