When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

I was young and foolish then; now I am old and foolisher.

Bewildered, bewildered, you have no complaint. You are what you are, and you ain't what you ain't.

I find humor in just about every situation. Even the most serious situations. And I find if you use it right, it allows the listener not to feel so uncomfortable. Or to even empathize with that character.

I look like a down-and-out drunk who has been picked out of the gutter in the Strand.

If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!