Some people get an education without going to college. The rest get it after they get out.

I think people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at goats, though.

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now.

A lot of my rhymes are just to get chuckles out of people. Anybody with half a brain is going to be able to tell when I'm joking and when I'm serious.

Americans are funny people. First, you shock them, and then they put you in a museum.

People have to follow their hearts, and if their hearts lead them to Wal-Mart, so be it.