Taking jobs to build up your resume is the same as saving up sex for old age.

I'm not interested in being Wonder Woman in the delivery room. Give me drugs.

The sex illusion is not a fixed quantity: not what mathematicians call a constant. It varies from zero in my wife's case to madness in that of our stepsister.

As for his secret to staying married: "My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she is coming with me."

A lot of my rhymes are just to get chuckles out of people. Anybody with half a brain is going to be able to tell when I'm joking and when I'm serious.

When a man and a woman roll over each other on velvet grass in Kashmir valley, you expect them to make love - not sing in the voices of Kishore Kumar and Lata Mangeshkar.