Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.

It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you, mine are still greater.

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.