Quotes By George Bernard Shaw

Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.

Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't!

The liar's punishment is, not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else.

My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.

Success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same one a second time.

When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.

A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time. When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, The one I feed the most.

As long as I have a want, I have a reason for living. Satisfaction is death.

Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it.

Hatred is the coward's revenge for being intimidated.

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.

Human beings are the only animals of which I am thoroughly and cravenly afraid.

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.

The things most people want to know about are usually none of their business.

The test of a man's or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel.

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.

A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work.

The English are not a very spiritual people, so they invented cricket to give them some idea of eternity.