Quotes By George Bernard Shaw

Alcohol is a very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning.

I never climbed any ladder: I have achieved eminence by sheer gravitation.

Atrocities are not less atrocities when they occur in laboratories and are called medical research.

Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honor, generosity, and beauty as conspicuously as the want of it represents illness, weakness, disgrace, meanness, and ugliness.

Give women the vote, and in five years there will be a crushing tax on bachelors.

Nothing soothes me more after a long and maddening course of pianoforte recitals than to sit and have my teeth drilled.

An election is a moral horror, as bad as a battle except for the blood; a mud bath for every soul concerned in it.

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not.

If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience.

Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does.

In literature the ambition of the novice is to acquire the literary language; the struggle of the adept is to get rid of it.

I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.

Science is always simple and always profound. It is only the half-truths that are dangerous.

If you eliminate smoking and gambling, you will be amazed to find that almost all an Englishman's pleasures can be, and mostly are, shared by his dog.

He who confuses political liberty with freedom and political equality with similarity has never thought for five minutes about either.

A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.

In a battle all you need to make you fight is a little hot blood and the knowledge that it's more dangerous to lose than to win.

Consistency is the enemy of enterprise, just as symmetry is the enemy of art.

Virtue consists, not in abstaining from vice, but in not desiring it.