Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.

I'd like to say "thank you" on behalf of the group and ourselves and I hope we passed the audition.

That's part of our policy, is not to be taken seriously, because I think our opposition, whoever they may be, in all their manifest forms, don't know how to handle humor.

Love means having to say you're sorry every fifteen minutes.

I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years to have breakfast together, but it was so disagreeable we had to stop.