Opera is when a tenor and soprano want to make love, but are prevented from doing so by a baritone.

All autobiographies are lies. I do not mean unconscious, unintentional lies: I mean deliberate lies.

Hell is full of musical amateurs: music is the brandy of the damned. May not one lost soul be permitted to abstain?

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.

Clever and attractive women do not want to vote; they are willing to let men govern as long as they govern men.

The business man - a man to whom age brings golf instead of wisdom.