Brevity is the soul of wit.

Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

We came to South America originally because we were invited down. They wanted four wholesome lads to play some nice music. Now I'd like to buy up the entire continent and install myself as President.

Radiohead didn't copy The 1975, they're fucking Radiohead. They could steal my actual legs and and I'd not be bothered anyways.

I've been on a calendar, but I've never been on time.