Therapy is extremely expensive. Popping bubble wrap is radically cheap.

Voting for Trump is like asking me to drive a car.

If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!

My mom loved to sing - and I'll go on record and say she was the worst singer ever. I'd get up and move away from her!

The British nation is unique in this respect. They are the only people who like to be told how bad things are, who like to be told the worst.

I had holes in my jeans well before it was fashionable.