If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!

Therapy is extremely expensive. Popping bubble wrap is radically cheap.

Voting for Trump is like asking me to drive a car.

I do have one instruction for you, General. Do something about that damned football team.

My mom loved to sing - and I'll go on record and say she was the worst singer ever. I'd get up and move away from her!

I had holes in my jeans well before it was fashionable.