Never let the truth get in the way of a good story.

Humor is the ability to discern in a kindly way the folly in what is considered normal, sublime behavior, and to discern the discrepancy in what appears as a truth.

The truth hurts, but silence kills.

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

The source of all humor is not laughter, but sorrow.

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.