Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me.

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.

Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.

Marry or marry not, in any either case you'll regret it.

Good behavior wins even an enemy.

The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear.