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Like most girls I'm always really self-conscious about do I look fat, if my legs are short, if I'm weird shaped, but when I go on stage, man, it never occurs to me. I think I look beautiful.
I used to feel unsafe right in the moment of an accomplishment - I felt the ground fall from under my feet because this could be the end. And even now, while everyone is celebrating, I'm on to the next thing. I don't want to get lost in this big cushion of success.
I remember really vividly kneeling by my bed as a nine-year-old, saying my prayers and asking God to give me boobs that were so big that if I laid on my back I wouldn't be able to see my feet.
I have insecurities of course, but I don't hang out with anyone who points them out to me.
Being abandoned by my mother gives me a sense of insecurity that I will never recover from. I have to try and recreate that balance by trying to create a sense of self-worth. And yes, being on stage is a part of that.
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